With time winding down in my abroad
experience, I thought I would take the time to make a post just about people in general and thoughts I have had while reflecting about myself. Also, I would like to thank those who have kept up with my blog posts. I will now present two pieces: one is a poem about something I specifically noticed about people, the second piece is a rap about how I feel in relation to that specific thing (omitting what the specific thing is because I would like readers to interpret both pieces), and further self reflection.
GroupMe
I’ve noticed people’s dependency on other people
…
Don’t leave me out of the group
I’m a member of the squad
Don’t walk without me please
Let me, catch up
Include me in the conversation
I may not be aware of what is being discussed
But, I’ll stare until I can join
Beg and plead for your attention with my eyes
Begin to laugh when I have no idea what the joke was
Ask: “really?”
Not knowing what I’m responding to
Then, hoping that someway, somehow
I can incorporate myself into a discussion
I need to be noticed
I need to be seen
I need to know that these friends
Or these acquaintances
Know that I am here
I don’t want to be alone
. …
I can’t relate.
Black Introvert Thoughts: Indonesia
I do not mind being isolated
Away from all the nonsense
Making my own experience
Probably writing new content
Probably tryna make sense of things
Probably stuffing my pockets
Evading all that’s perfunctory
Probably just busy watching
Observing and steady plottin’
People be really cheesy
But none of ‘em really poppin’
Wastin’ breath all that talkin’
23 other students
Few that I can connect with
Knowing a lot of people
But only few finna check-in
Tryna take in this blessing
Flexin’ in Indonesia
Learning things as I go
And I’m constantly m-m-meminta
Hoping I ain’t no creeper
Pulling up on the people
Curious ‘bout they lives
Old and wise, I really need ya
Bunch of these Asian teachers
Better than some my teachers
Bagus guru
Keeping me in the loop
And takin’ me through the hoops
Sometimes I feel gugup
Love my Bapak, Ibu
All of my sisters too
Missin’ my baby too
Hope that she killin’ school
Eating up all this food
Enjoying my time here too
And for the most part
It’s been really dope, and hard
But I’ll be glad to leave
Man I’m just way too far
Just some B.I. thoughts
